JOKE 1
A Surd was jumped by two muggers and fought like hell,but was finall subdued.His attackers then proceeded to go
through his pockets.
"You mean u fought like that for 57 cents?"asked one of the muggers increduously.
" is that all u wanted?"moaned the surd."i thought u were after the 400 rupees in my shoes!"
-------------------------------------------------
JOKE 2
banta singh happened to be in a queue at a railway station ticket counter with a man ahead of him.
"Ek Punjab Mail dena",demanded the man in front.he was given a ticket(Punjab mail is name of the train)
then came the turn of banta singh," ikk Punjab female dena"
"what do u mean by punjab female"asked the clerk.
" it is for my wife "replied the banta.
------------------------------------------------
JOKE 3
SURD WRITES EXAM
Sardar Gurbachan Singh is appearing for his University final examination. He takes his seat in the examination hall,
stares at the question paper for five minutes, and then in a fit of inspiration takes his shoes off and throws them
out of the window. He then removes his turban and throws it away as well. His shirt, pant, socks and watch follow
suit.
The invigilator, alarmed, approaches him and asks what is going on.
"Oye, I am only following the instructions yaar," he says, "it says here, 'Answer the following questions in
BRIEF'."
--------------------------------------------------
JOKE 4
SURD LOSES DONKEY
Having lost his donkey a Sardarji, got down to his knees and started thanking God. A passerby saw him and asked,
"Your donkey is missing; what are you thanking God for?"
The Sardarji replied "I am thanking Him for seeing to it that I wasn't riding the donkey at that time, otherwise I
would have been missing too."
--------------------------------------------------
JOKE 5
SURD'S NOTHING
When God passed out brains, I thought he said trains, and I missed mine.
When God passed out looks, I thought He said books, and I didn't want any.
When God passed out ears, I thought He said beers, and I asked for two long ones.
When God passed out legs, I thought He said kegs, and I asked for two fat ones.
When God passed out noses, I thought He said roses, and I asked for a big red one.
When God passed out heads, I thought He said beds, and I asked for a big soft one.
God am I a mess?
No you're a SARDAR!!
--------------------------------------------------
SURD RUNS FOR EXERCISE
The doctor told the sardarji that if he ran eight kilometers a day for 300 days, he would loose 34 kilos. At the end
of 300 days, the sardarji called the doctor to report he had lost the weight, but he had a problem.
"What's the problem?"asked the doctor.
"I'm 2400 kms from home."
-------------------------------------------------
LOVING HUSBAND:
Several men are in the locker room of a golf club.
A cell phone on a bench rings and a man engages the hands free
speaker-function and begins to talk.
Everyone else in the room stops to listen.
MAN: "Hello"
WOMAN: "Honey, it's me. Are you at the club?"
MAN: "Yes"
WOMAN: "I am at the mall now and found this beautiful leather
coat..It's only $1,000. Is it OK if I buy it?"
MAN: "Sure, ..go ahead if you like it that much."
WOMAN: "I also stopped by the Mercedes dealership and saw the new
2004 models. I saw one I really liked."
MAN: "How much?"
WOMAN: "$60,000"
MAN: OK, but for that price I want it with all the options.
WOMAN: "Great! Oh, and one more thing....the house we wanted last
year is back on the market. They're asking $950,000."
MAN: Well, then go ahead and give them an offer, but just offer
$900,000.
WOMAN: OK. I'll see you later! I love you!
MAN: "Bye, I love you, too."
The man hangs up.
The other men in the locker room are looking at him in
astonishment.
Then he asks: "Anyone know who this phone belongs to?"
------------------------------------------------
SUPERNATURAL ...
There was this case in the hospital's Intensive care ward where patients
always died in the same bed and on Sunday morning at 11a.m., regardless of
their medical condition.
This puzzled the doctors and some even thought that it had something to do
with the supernatural. No one could solve the mystery as to why the deaths
took place at 11 AM.
So a world-wide expert team was constituted and they decided to go down to
the ward to investigate the cause of the incidents. So on the next Sunday
morning few minutes before 11 a.m., all doctors and nurses nervously waited
outside the ward to see for themselves what the terrible phenomenon was all
about. Some were holding wooden crosses,prayer books and other holy objects
to ward off evil........ Just when the clock struck 11...
and then......
Santa Singh, the part-time Sunday sweeper, entered the ward and unplugged
the life support system & plugged in the vacuum cleaner.
|